If one were to ask another how I work/interact with people, depending on where they are from, their personal temperament and other factors, you would most likely get a variety of responses that will sound like the following: she is difficult to get along with, I do not understand her, she seems mean, Gerina is very honest, she is great at pushing one to be their best, I adore her, when you get a chance to know her heart, everything else makes sense. Although I know that I can be difficult to be around for some there is not much I have changed about who I am because the things that makes certain people uncomfortable are not really my issues it is there's. However the things I can control that I recognize as a problem I attempt to change.
One of the things is taking charge of situations and dominating which is easy because I have a strong personality. On this trip I have recognized strong personalities, insecurities and sensitivities so I told myself to put manager Gerina to bed and relax and go with the flow...well that can only last for a few weeks and that it did. Going along with the flow all the time to avoid tensions and hurt feelings will cause exactly that because when people make decisions that are not the best I get very annoyed and hyper critical which makes me a not so nice a person.
Therefore I prefer to work and do particular things alone (however that is not wise in this context nor in ministry). So what should I do? Compromise, and I am a fan of the theory of compromise however that does not always work. I realize that I am only good at working in groups when each person has their own thing to work on that assists to paint a larger picture. Or if I work alongside a person that is very logical, has a steady temperament and is very competent in their skills. This is important to me because these type of people I can trust and respect.
This trip is assisting me in realizing more things about myself which is important so when I am working alongside people I know what to adjust and what to share about how I work. On the Myers-Briggs Assessment I score as a Field Marshall and Producer a person that delegates and oversees. This trait of mine is considered masculine and manifests in other ways that causes tension with males especially in romantic relationships. In relationships it is important that mates are partners and work with one another. I am learning that I need a partner that is confident (not arrogant), intelligent, compassionate, understanding, logical and even tempered. A man that is not offended by my "me-ness".
I realize that I am speaking of relationships and that was not my point of this entry...oh well I am at that age.
No comments:
Post a Comment